How to Create
a Professional Press Release

by Daniel Janal

Press releases can help you get more visitors to your site, but in order for the press to take your releases and print them (or post them on their sites), you need to make sure your releases are really newsworthy.

Reporters get far more press releases than they can ever use, so they start by throwing out the ones that are boring or unprofessional. If your press release doesn't look professional, it goes in the trash. If it doesn't say something of interest it goes into the "circular file." If it's longwinded or boring it's not news, it's history.

So to help ensure your press release gets released in the press, this article will show you how to write and design a professional-looking press release.

The first step—what to write about? A press release doesn't have to be earth shattering, but it should be specific. Don't try to write about the fact that your company is "still here," unless it's because you all just survived a swarm of killer bees. A release should be about new products, new services, new people, or events.

• Release and  contact: Tell reporters when to release your information and whom to contact.
• The headline: Sum it up and get their attention. Make them want to read more.
• The body: Tell the who, what, when, where, why, and how—and then make it better. A case study helps you see the finer points.
• Putting it together: Make sure your press release includes all of the important elements and then clean it up.
• Send it to the presses: Print out a test copy and adjust the text before you make final copies, send it to the Web, or start e-mailing the release.

Release and contact

Every press release starts with the release date. Put "For Immediate Release" in the upper left-hand corner. This message tells reporters they can use the release the second they receive it. If you want reporters to hold the story until a certain time, you would write "For Release On DATE." Presumably, reporters would respect your wishes. But, they don't have to honor this request and some don't.

The next item is the contact information. This is your name, phone number (with extension), and e-mail address. If you have several contacts, i.e., one for the media, one for dealers, and one for consumers, list those name and numbers as well. You should end up with something like this:

 For Immediate Release
 Contact:
 Daniel Janal
 Janal Communications
 612-380-1554
 dan@janal.com
 www.janal.com

Straightforward, I know, but you would be surprised how many people forget this vital information.

The headline

Now, we get to the most important part of the release: the headline. Sometimes it's the only thing a person will read. If it interests them, they'll read more. If not, we're talking scratch paper.

A headline is one or two lines that telegraph the most important points of your news. For example:

"OurCompany.com Names Jill Green Vice President of Marketing"

"Consumers Can Win $100,00 at OurCompany.com's Contest"

What makes a good headline? Think of the first words you'd say to someone when they pick up the phone and you have a really great story to tell. A good headline sounds something like that. It should read and sound like a headline you read in a newspaper. Think to yourself: "If I could write the headline in the newspaper, what would it say?" Now, write it down.

Don't be salesy

Remember that a headline doesn't sound like an ad, a direct marketing letter, or some other, over-the-top piece of marketing communication. Here are examples of bad headlines that sound like ads or marketing brochures:

You Can Win a Fortune at OurCompany.com

 Special Sales Offers at OurCompany.com. Today Only

Now, on to style. Notice that every word begins with a capital letter. Center each line. Don't use all caps. Don't use periods at the end of lines.

You can bold face the headline if you like.

The body

The body of the press release follows. However, before you start your story, you must include a "dateline," which is the name of the city in which the news happens and the date. It looks like this:

LOS ANGELES — June 30, 2000 — OurCompany.com today announced…

It is important to put the year into the press release because your release could be on your Web site or in a printed press kit after a new year starts. Reporters need to be able to tell when the press release was written.

Who, what, when, where, and why?

The first paragraph grabs attention with a catchy opening or tells the story by answering the 5 W's and H: who, what, when, where, why, and how. Formal press release writing used to say that the first paragraph answered all those questions. Now, writing rules have relaxed to the point where you can use two paragraphs to tell the highlights.

As long as you grab attention in a thoughtful, provocative, or interesting manner, almost anything goes.

Making it "better"

Let's look at a case study. A few months ago, eFuse.com editor Daniel Will-Harris wrote a press release to promote an on-line contest. He wrote an interesting lead paragraph that would grab a reader's attention.

Think Y3K. Where will you be in the year 3000? Chances are you won't be around, and neither will your Web site. We have a great solution to preserve your pages for posterity, and it's fun for everyone.

He then talked about the offer to put a Web site in a time capsule. This was a good start. He asked me to review the release and see if I could beef it up.

He sent me the release via e-mail as an attachment. I used Microsoft Word to read the release. Then I turned on the "Track Changes" feature in the Tools menu. While I edited the release, the program struck a line through what I had crossed out and showed the text I had written in a contrasting color. This made it easy for Daniel to see the changes. No one knows their material by heart, so this feature is a blessing. Because of the color coding, we could easily track our changes.

I saved the file under a new name (press release revisions 1) and sent it as an attachment to Daniel. He added his changes to mine. Word showed his changes in a different color, so I could see what he suggested. Then he saved the file under a new name (press release revisions 2) and sent it back to me via e-mail. If you use this procedure, you'll be able to keep track of all of the files and changes.

Basically, I liked the release (I have to say that; he pays the bills! He really is a good writer!). However the writing appeared flat, despite his great opening paragraph. Fortunately, I had a simple trick of the trade up my sleeve that would liven things up—and not offend him.

I simply turned his prose into quotes!

Quotes make a story come alive. Consider this example from Daniel's release:

Technology changes so fast that even if you've been using a computer for just five years, you could have disks and files you can no longer read. So it could be impossible to read your Web site in as few as 10 years—not to mention 100 or 1,000! But http://www.efuse.com "the friendly place to learn how to build a better Web site" has a solution.

I changed it to a somewhat less wordy sentence, adding quote marks, an attribution to Daniel Will-Harris, and a final sentence that rounds out the quote.

"Technology changes so fast that your computer can't read the disks you used five years ago! So it could be impossible to read your Web site in as few as 10 years—not to mention 100 or 1,000!" said Daniel Will-Harris, editor of eFuse, an on-line magazine that bills itself as the friendly place to build a better Web site, http://www.efuse.com. "We have a better solution to preserve your pages for posterity, and it will be fun for everyone."

Doesn't that sound better? Daniel thought so and kept it.

"Great changes," he wrote to me. "I usually hate it when people rewrite my releases." (I wouldn't know that feeling of being rewritten.)

The next paragraphs told about the specifics of the offer. Your release can include quotes from company executives and, if necessary, the company's customers, partners, or industry/financial analysts who cover the company.

Visit http://www.efuse.com and sign up for our free e-mail FuseLetter before December 31, 1999, and we'll print your home page and place it in the eFuse.com Time Capsule—for free!

The three most interesting sites win a copy of NetObjects Fusion (a $299 value). The 10 most interesting sites will be featured on the eFuse.com Millennium Sites page.

At this point, I felt the need to jazz up the release. Reporters are trained to write about the superlatives in life: the biggest pumpkin, the smallest chip. So I took a liberty and wrote:

"This contest could lead to the largest mass cataloging and storing of information in the history of the world," Will-Harris said. "Nothing lasts forever, but this will at least help your site last longer than it otherwise would!"

I liked this, and so did he. In fact, if we had more time to think about it, I might have even turned this into the press release's main focus. But deadlines loomed.

Hidden leads

That's why you should look for a buried lead. You might surprise yourself and find that your really interesting material is at the bottom and needs to be moved higher. Don't worry. That happens because the more we write, the more innovative and creative we become. We loosen up and do better work. It is like warming up when you begin to exercise your body! You can run more comfortably after you've loosened up!

Since we've told our news, now we need to talk about our company to establish and build credibility. Daniel separated the section with a subhead:

About www.efuse.com:

And wrote the company's positioning statement:

eFuse.com is www.NetObjects.com's friendly place to learn how to build a better Web site. eFuse.com offers information, inspiration, and assistance written in plain English by professional writers and designers including Roger Parker, Lynda Weinman, Dan Janal, and Daniel Will-Harris, so it's easy to understand and use, no matter what software you use.

eFuse.com walks you through the steps it takes to build an effective site. "Start Here" is the place for beginners. "Plan" guides you through the important first stage of your site. "Design" shows you how to make your site look good. "Build" tells you how to create your site. "Grow" gives you the information you need to make your site successful.

Small business owner  Karen Linden said, "This site is like a life raft in the ocean of Web technology. I spent $200 on a seminar and didn't learn as much as I learned on your site. It's fun and easy to read!"

(Comment: It is a good idea to include quotes from users and analysts whenever possible to bolster credibility in a press release. After all, reporters don't believe boasts made by company officials. Neither do you!)

The FuseLetter is eFuse.com's free, twice-monthly e-mail newsletter that offers the latest tips and information you need to make your site work for you. See back issues at http://www.fuseletter.com

eFuse.com is for everyone who wants to build a more attractive and effective Web site. Learn what you need, painlessly. No experience necessary. You'll be Web savvy in no time.

Contact: Daniel Will-Harris, editor@efuse.com, 415-555-1212.

-30-

To indicate the press release's ending, put "# # #" or "-30-," which lets reporters know the release is finished and that no pages were lost. 

Length

Your goal should be to have a one-page press release. That forces you to condense your message and make it "short and sweet." But sometimes you have more to say than will fit in a page, so if it has to be two pages, don't beat yourself up. If it's three pages, start flailing.

Putting it together

In this example, you've seen a model press release and all its elements:

• The contact information
• Headline
• Lead
• Supplemental paragraphs filled with information, quotes, and details
• Background information about the company

Now you need to copy edit the press release.

Writer Anne Lamott compared this to brushing teeth: You put it down, clean it up, and then polish.

You've just completed the first step. Let's go back and clean it up:

• Make sure you're saying something of interest to other people, not just yourself or your company.
• Make sure your release is conversational rather than technical and full of jargon.
• Use short sentences and paragraphs, so the release can be read easily and quickly.
• Make your text active. Unless your name is "Will," chances are you can remove "will" and rewrite your sentences to be more active.
• Review for grammar and spelling.
• Cut claims that can't be proven. Delete the words "revolutionary" or "first" unless you are rock solid sure it really is, because there is nothing a reporter likes more than proving you wrong.
• Remove unnecessary words that don't add anything but length to the press release. If you can cut out dead words, you'll have more room for words that add value to the release. I'm a professional writer, but I can still cut 10 percent of my words when I edit my articles. Imagine what you can do!

Some word-cutting tips include:

• Removing "of" and  many other prepositional phrases. For example, the previous sentence first read: "Some of my word-cutting tips." The sentence actually reads better with fewer words!
• The last bullet point read: "Remove any unnecessary words." I didn't lose anything by cutting it. (I almost wrote, "cutting it out." Didn't need the word "out," did I?) Be ruthless!
• See if sentences can live without the words "that" or "which." "The" is another word waster, in many cases, but not all. Remember, you only have 500 words to work with, so be ruthless. If you use a news release distribution service, such as PR Newswire or Busines Wire, you'll pay more for each word over 400 words, so being wordy is being costly!

It is always a good idea to have another person read the release to make sure they understand it and to look for typos. Remember, a computer's spell checker can be your best friend but also your worst enemy if it introduces errors.

Send it to the presses

Now you are ready to print the press release. Print a test copy on your letterhead to make sure everything lines up properly and nothing prints on top of your pre-printed material, such as your address or company logo. Make adjustments. Test again. After you've debugged this, you are ready to print all of the copies you need.

The release should be no longer than two pages. If it is too long, see if you can tighten the space by deleting extra lines of white space, or removing "widows" which are one- to three-word sentence fragments at the end of paragraphs.

You should also post this press release to a page on your Web site. Consider creating a template for press releases and simply paste each new release into the template. You'll save a lot of time!

Finally, create a text or ASCII version of the press release to send via e-mail.

Now you are ready to distribute the press release to the media. We'll cover that important topic in the next article.

About the author

Speaker, author, and consultant Dan Janal's new book is called, Dan Janal's Guide to Marketing on the Internet: Getting People to Visit, Buy and Become Customers for Life. He also has written How to Publicize High Tech Products and Services, and Publicity Builder (a book with software). He can be reached at dan@janal.com or www.janal.com.

Illustrations by Jonathan Evans for www.artville.com